This past weekend was not my proudest moment as a wife. Though it started with me showing off my domestic skills around my own house, it almost ended with me in tears and reduced to the emotional level of a three year old….
I spent almost the entire day of Saturday in the kitchen. I made omelets for breakfast, green curry stir-fry for lunch, lentil and veggie stew for dinner, AND two dozen crème-filled cupcakes for a Super Bowl party. All this time, my husband was working on the computer or on the couch reading. This isn’t uncommon for a weekend, but as I continued through my day of domesticity, I started to grow resentful toward him. I couldn’t help but thinking that, if it weren’t for me, we would have starved and had to bring store purchased pastries (forbid!) to the party on Sunday.
After dinner, my husband looked at the crockpot that was still “Keeping Warm” our stew, and asked, “Are you going to leave this on all night?” That one simple question lead to what can only be described as a temper tantrum, meltdown, or psycho-wife moment. After all, it showed that he was expecting me to do EVERYTHING around the house, right?!?
In my rational mind, I know this is not true, but I had inhaled a lot of powdered sugar and was slightly out of my mind. So, after an hour of noisily cleaning the kitchen from top to bottom (yes, my temper tantrums even involve me cleaning…), I finally sat down and told my husband how rude and uncaring his comment was. I will let you imagine the conversation that happened after that.
Through all of this, I (re)learned an important lesson:
My husband cannot read my mind. My day would have been much easier if I would have simply prompted my husband to tell me, “Thank you,” and asked him to help me clean up the kitchen. Yes, it would have been ideal for him to do that on his own, but he had no idea the resentment that was building up inside me all day until I told him.
At the end of the day, I realized that if he can forgive me for acting like a preschooler, I suppose I can forgive him for not having super powers.